Hogsmeade Pizza (9. Tonight, Tonight)

Harry landed them slowly on Hermione’s front porch, the lantern on the wall flickered on as soon as it sensed movement and Hermione rolled her eyes.

“Honestly…my mum does this to spy I swear!” she said, referring to the lights.

“Let her watch then.” Harry grinned, a devilish look coming into his green eyes.

“Yuck.” Hermione frowned; her mother watching was just too gross a thought. “That’s really disgusting Harry.” He laughed in reply, then leaned down and brought his lips to hers, immediately sweeping his tongue into her mouth. She pressed up against him, throwing her arms around his neck.

They stayed on the porch for a long while, and Hermione finally pulled away to gulp some air into her lungs. Breathless, they both just stared at each other for a few long moments.

“Stay here tonight.” Hermione heard herself say.

“What?” Harry looked taken back.

She licked her lips. “I want you to stay here; I don’t want our evening to end.”

“How would I…come in?” Harry asked. “I mean, if your mother is right there inside your house she’ll see me.”

Hermione thought a moment. “I’ll go in, and then in about three minutes, you fly up behind the house, and my bedroom is the second window on the left. I’ll let you in that way.”

Harry was still gaping at her. Hermione brought her hand up under his chin and snapped his mouth shut. “Close it, you’re letting in flies.” She raised herself up and kissed him lightly. “See you in three minutes.”

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Susan giggled as Ron pinned her beneath him and kissed her again.

“Ron do that thing you did the other day at the pizza parlour.” Susan said, needing him. She wanted him so badly at the moment; she’d even marry him to get him in the sack. Again.

“I just did!” Ron protested, but Susan raised a finger to his lips.

“Well, do it again!” she insisted, rearranging her body beneath his. One smile from her was all it took, so he bent over her once more, and began to work his way down…he would start kissing her lightly, teasingly, from her forehead, down her face, her cheeks, her lips, then go to her neck, suckling her skin lightly.

“Ohhhh Great Wizards….” Susan moaned as Ron’s hands began to explore where his mouth wasn’t.

“Shhhh do you want to wake your parents?” Ron pulled himself away from Susan.

“Ron don’t stop!” Susan cried out.

“But you’re so loud!” Ron said in a loud whisper.

Susan looked around for a moment. “All right, okay, we’ll just go to my room.”

“Your PARENTS!” Ron hissed for the second time.

“They’re asleep!” Susan said sharply, beginning to be a bit frustrated. She pulled Ron’s head down to hers, pressing her lips to his urgently. Ron groaned and began to respond; Susan tugged on his trousers until they were off.

“Ummm…Ron….” Her back was arched as his hand travelled down her side lightly, with the most fluent of caresses. “RON!!!” her voice rose to a low shout and Ron almost dropped her on the floor.

“I’m leaving!” his voice was finite.

“No, Ron!!” her pleas now fell on deaf ears as Ron got up and tried to walk to the door and pull his trousers on at the same time. “Come on Ron…”

“Sue…I’ve got to go.” He tried not to look at her, because he knew if he did, she’d convince him to stay. Susan walked over to him until his back was to the door and pressed herself against him.

“Just one more kiss.” She simply said, resting her chin on his chest and staring up at him imploringly. Ron sighed, and then smiled as he looked at her. He bent his head down and kissed her again, and she raised herself up on her toes to deepen it. Susan teased his mouth for a few minutes and then began to open his shirt back up and press opened mouth kisses to his chest.

“What are you doing?” Ron’s voice was breathless and his head was thrown back against the door.

“Your little guy…” Susan answered. “He just needs a bit of fresh air…” she successfully managed to pull his trousers back down and began to tug on his knickers.

“Sue!!” Ron’s voice was the loud one now. “Cut it out!!!!”

“What?” she asked innocently, bringing herself back up.

“I’m telling you, we should be making a commitment before this keeps going on!” Ron exclaimed.

“All right….” Susan would say anything right now to keep things going her way. “But first things first.” She began to go back down when Ron grabbed her arms and pulled her back up. “What?” she asked again.

“I think we should be married!” Ron’s voice was now insistent. “Susan, I love you, why do you keep avoiding the topic of us being married?”

“Ron, I swear, if you keep talking about getting married I’m going to scream!” Susan warned.

“Marriage, married…” Ron said.

“AHHHHHH!!!” Susan let out a scream.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” another voice answered her. Ron and Susan jumped apart and were horrified to find Mr. and Mrs. Bones standing in the doorway.

“AHHHHH!!” Susan screamed again.

“WHAT THE HELL?” Mr. Bones thundered. Ron was terrified of the shorter man as he lunged into the room. The worst part of all this was that Ron’s trousers were still down around his knees. He ran behind the table as Mr. Bones tried to jump over it to get at him. Susan screamed and jumped on his back, while she shouted for Ron to run.

“Nothing happened, I swear!” Ron kept saying as Susan forcefully held her father back.

“Run Ron!!” she was yelling as her father swore and shook his fist at Ron. Ron finally got his trousers up and stumbled out the door.

“Thank you Mr. Bones!!!” he yelled back as he fell over onto the lawn and collapsed on his broom.

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

“So there was my father, all 130 pounds of him, trying to kick the shit out of Ron, and Ron’s trying to be a gentleman and say nothing happened while pulling his trousers up….if I wasn’t so scared of how red my father’s face was, I’d have laughed myself silly.” Susan was giggling as she told Hermione and Lavender what had happened the previous evening.

“So close to a clean getaway.” Hermione said, wiping her eyes.

“Why don’t you and Ron just get married?” Lavender wondered aloud.

“Because…it’s more convenient this way.” Susan struggled to find the right words.

“What if you get knocked up?” Hermione asked.

“I’m not going to.” Susan replied confidently.

“Susan!!!” a male voice cut through their conversation. “Hey Sue!” it was Ron; he was sailing by on the river on his way out to get the catch.

Susan looked up, an expectant smile on her face, which faded as soon as she saw the boat.

“What do you think?” Ron asked, grinning widely as he slapped his hand against the side of the boat. Instead of saying Susan, like it had, it now read Shag Fiend.

Hermione and Lavender both began to laugh uproariously, they clutched onto one another to keep from falling over.

“That’s not funny!” Susan was angry; her red hair was flying as she charged down to the docks. “Whose side are you guys on?”

Ron and his friends were laughing as well as Susan came to the end of the dock.

“You know something Ron? You are the biggest ASSHOLE!” Susan screamed. “I’m so glad now I never married you!”

“Oh come on!” Ron was no longer laughing.

“You think this is going to make me want to marry you? Well it’s not, because I don’t have to be married to a daft prick like you!”

“Sue, I’m just joking!!” Ron was now beginning to look worried.

“You can’t force me to do something I’m not ready to do!” Susan screamed as she reached the edge of the dock and the boat went sailing by. Hermione and Lavender had come up behind her, still laughing. “And until I am, IF I EVER AM, THE ANSWER IS NO!!! NO!!!!” she stamped her foot to make her point.

“Sue, I was joking!!!!” Ron’s voice faded away as the boat went further down the river.

Susan turned around and glared at her two friends. “Thanks a lot, you two.” She said, marching back to the pier. “Nice to know I have two such great friends.”

“Oh come on Sue, you heard him, he was joking!” Hermione used the same tone of voice Ron had, and Lavender nearly collapsed in a fit of the giggles.

A crowd of people had gathered and were now applauding as the three of them reached the pier. Susan set her mouth in a grim line.

“Asshole.” She said as she walked by, jerking her thumb over her shoulder.


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