Mesmerized Drowning (Chapter Three: Star Gazing)

Try not to let your mind wander. It is too small to be out by itself.

The end of September was drawing near, which meant the upcoming Quidditch match was just around the corner. I’ve never been a big fan of it, but one couldn’t help but feel excited when everyone around you talked about it 24/7. Being friends with Ron wasn’t a big help either since he bombarded me with Quidditch talk whenever he wasn’t talking about wizard’s chess; something that he was ridiculously good at and prided himself for it.

With the buzz of excitement around me, I found it hard to concentrate on my studies wherever I went. I also found myself thinking about him a bit too much for my liking. Eversince our encounter in the library, I’ve pondered on thoughts and questions that I couldn’t find the answers to. Why did he even speak to me? I’ve already earned the title of Goody Two Shoes Granger from most of the Slytherins. Why would the great Harry Potter waste his breath on me…in some friendly conversation?

Oh stupid thoughts. Stop pestering me! I’ve got to finish my Arithmancy assignment and Potions essay by this Friday if I wanted to even think of going to watch the Quidditch match. I’ve always had a motto of assignments before fun and games, and I wasn’t about to break this motto now.

“Two more days!” Parvati squealed and flopped down beside me.

“Are you that eager to see us on broomsticks?” Seamus asked hautingly as he emerged from the potrait hole.

Lavender scowled and bonked him on the head from behind. “Of course not, you git. I see enough of you everyday!”

I sighed. So much for a peaceful study period.

Seamus was pouting and faking a hurt expression on his face. “That’s not very nice Miss Lavender Brown.”

“Oh please,” Lavender huffed and took a seat on one of the many squashy, scarlet lounge chairs in the Gryffindor common room.

Parvati giggled, “We’re not interested in watching you play Seamus. As much as we love you, we’re actually looking forward to see Harry play.” She examined her nails and stole a quick glance at Lavender who nodded in agreement.

Seamus grunted and I actually thought he looked angry for a second there. “Right. Of course! It’s only natural that the whole female population go on their knees at Potter’s presence.”

“Not everyone,” I finally spoke up.

Seamus glanced at me and grinned, “Yeah, the rest of the male population can all count on Hermione to not join the Harry Potter fan club, right Herms?”

I slowly nodded, “…I suppose…”

“Exactly,” Seamus shook his head while heading towards the boy’s dormitories. “I’m glad there’s someone who’s not so shallow.”

Once Seamus was out of sight, Parvati started ranting about like a wild cat. “Oh what does he know!? He’s not a girl. And if he was, I’m sure he’ll just be like the rest of us!”

“That’s not a pleasant thought,” I murmered.

“Hermione! But you must agree that Harry is way too…” Lavender was leaning on the edge of her seat now with the most dumb look on her face.

“Perfect!” Both girls finished in unison and erupted into giggles.

After a few seconds of endless giggling I had to slam my potions textbook on the coffee table in front of me. That did the trick for they instantly silenced themselves.

“Can’t you two do something else in your spare time rather than acting like two crazed baboons?!” I snapped impatiently.

Parvati blinked, “Why baboons?”

“Why not spent our free time admiring someone who’s worthy of admiration?” Lavender quipped.

I rolled my eyes at the two. “Because it’s getting supid and what good will it do to wish for the impossible?!” I flung my arms in the air in exasperation.

“Are you saying we’re stupid?” Lavender’s brow creased.

Parvati frowned, “And are you saying that it’s impossible for Harry to notice us?!”

“Well, no! But…”

Parvati huffed and crossed her arms, “If you’re dissing us you might as well be dissing the whole female population of Hogwarts.”

“And don’t think that you’re excluded from this group. I see you stealing glances at him myself!” Lavender declared in an accusing tone of voice.

“So what if I do?!” The words came spilling out before I could stop them. “At least I can have a decent conversation with him rather than spending seven years drooling about him like you two!”

Both of their eyes widened and I finally realized what I had just spilt.

“You talked with him?!” They both exclaimed.

“When?! Why?! That’s amazing Hermione!”

I stared at them in complete disbelief. One second ago we were at the edge of getting into a silly arguement and the next they were staring at me in awe.

“It was nothing.” I got up quickly and stuffed my books into my bag.

“Where are you going?”

“Uh…to the Great Hall. It’s almost dinner time anyways,” I lied and slipped out of Gryffindor Tower and away from two love-sick roommates.

Ok, I have to admit that Harry is quite a catch in looks and all that. But what about that saying- don’t judge a book by its cover? We all don’t know him as a person. For all I know he could be some insane murderer pretending not to be one. Well that’s a bit far-fetched, but you get the idea. Or perhaps…he’s just as perfect on the inside…

What would dad and mum think of me if I owled them with my problems concerning a boy that I barely know? They would go mad and remind me that my studies ranked first when it came to anything else.

That’s right Hermione, we mustn’t stray from the path that we’ve been walking on from the very beginning just because of a pair of green eyes…

Yet…that thought just seemingly vanishes in an instance. It was just a moment ago that I had been scolding myself…yet now in another moment, I see those eyes again just over there, staring at me…

And I’m drowning all over again. Darn it.
Frankly my mouth speaks alot differently then my heart. Much to my dismay, guess who I’m staring at right now? Uh-huh, him- Harry Potter, the boy who lived. Alright, so L and D (my nickname for my two lovely roommates) finally got something right but I’m not infatuated over Harry like them. I’m staring at him just because….I have nothing better to do!

Or not. Well…I must admit I’m just curious. He is, afterall, the boy who single-handedly defeated dozens of Death Eaters and finally Voldemort himself. Who wouldn’t be curious about this hero?


I blinked.

“Herms!!” A hand flew in front of my face which caught my attention instantly.


“Your dinner is getting chilly,” Ron pointed out thoughtfully and stared at his own cleared plate. “If you’re not hungry…”

I waved a hand lazily at my untouched dinner. “Sure thing Ron, eat all you want.”

“Really?!” His eyes brightened and I couldn’t help but wonder how Ron did it; staying so fit and healthy when he clearly ate too much for his own good.

“Really Ron, I’m not that hungry,” I answered without another thought and found my eyes traveling towards the Slytherin table. I mentally smacked myself and tried to tear my gaze away when a set of cold gray eyes met mine. The figure stood and seemingly…approached Gryffindow table. Oh dear.

I quickly looked away and tried starting a conversation with Ginny who was sitting next to me. Maybe I was just hullicinating that some creepy looking guy was approaching me…

“Hermionknee Granger,” a voice drawled out unpleasantly.

I winced and hesitantly looked up while brushing a stray strand of hair from my face. I didn’t know what to say to this stranger…

“Draco Malfoy!” I heard Ginny hiss.

This was the infamous Draco Malfoy? Son of Lucius Malfoy who had abruptly disappeared after the fall of Voldemort? Draco Malfoy, the friend of Harry Potter? I gazed at his pale skin and sleek blonde hair, a smirk on his face. Somehow I couldn’t imagine him and Harry as goody goody buddies.

“Weasley,” He sneered. “What are you doing here?”

Ginny scoffed, her held held high. “Because this is Gryffindor table you dolt!”

Draco seemed to flush in embarrassment but hastily regained his composure. “Oh whatever, I didn’t come here to bicker with you.” His eyes landed on me once again. “So you’re the new girl aren’t you?”


He didn’t let me finish. “I see you’ve already earned the title of teacher’s pet? Head of the class now aren’t you? How surprising! I hear that you’re a muggle born, a Mudblood.”

My eyes flared and I immediately stood up to face him. “Who are you to say what I am?”

He raised an eyebrow at me, not expecting me to have retaliated. “Oh, feisty one are we? Aw too bad, I thought you might’ve been one of those quiet, shy, studious type of girl. You know, they’re the best in bed…”

Ginny suddenly stood up beside me. “Leave her alone!”

“Oh go away,” Draco scowled. “Why don’t you run home to that pathetic father of your’s?”

This boy was getting on my nerves. “Your father isn’t so wonderful himself.” I retorted. “I hear he ran away and hid when he figured he would be killed so he ran like a worthless scared rat!”

Ginny stared at me wide-eyed while Draco fumed in front of me with balled fists. We were creating quite a scene.

“How dare you insult my father!”

“You’re his lapdog!”

Draco looked so furious that I thought he would erupt and simply disappear. Yet before I could get a grip on things, I saw him reach into the pocket of his robes and bring out his wand…I quickly closed my eyes awaiting whatever curse he was going to cast at me…

“Stop it, Draco.” A calm voice admist the rest came to my rescue.

I opened my eyes, expecting to see a furious professor, but no- fate had a different plan. It was Harry.

He had brought a firm hand on Draco’s shoulder which caused Draco to lower his wand slightly. Draco now turned to meet Harry’s gaze with frustration written all over his face. “Potter! You don’t know what type of a wench this Mudblood is!”

I caught my breath, feeling slightly dazed at the sudden turn of events. I finally found my voice and uttered, “I’m not a Mudblood.”

Draco opened his mouth but Harry beat him to it. “Let’s go Hermione,” He stepped forward and waved a hand towards the big grand doors leading out of the Great Hall.

I looked at Harry in surprise. “What?” He stared back at me, a strange look in his eyes that told me to follow…I nodded slowly. “Right…let’s go…”

Ginny and Draco both looked at us dumbfounded, which I soon came to realize that the whole school was also following our every step towards the exit.

After what felt like the millionth step, we were finally pushing through the doors and away from everyone’s inquiring gazes. I let out a breath.

“Thank you…for saving me from Malfoy and all..”

Harry simply nodded, though I couldn’t read his expression through the dim light of the torch-lighted hallway. “Malfoy can sometimes be a git.”

“Sometimes?” I repeated in disbelief.

He headed towards the staircase that led towards the outside of the castle without answering me. When I didn’t follow, he looked over his shoulder, captivating me with his eyes that seemed to glow in the darkness. I felt my right foot step forward, slowly followed by my left foot…left,right,left,right…he smiled as I reached him and we both exited the castle and out onto the grounds.

I took a deep breath, filling my lungs with the fresh night air. We were facing the lake, the stars were out accompanying the half moon that hung bright in the velvet sky.

“Do you always come out here for no apparent reason?” I decided to break the ice, squinting at his figure which was approaching the lake. Clad in our black school robes, it was hard to see one another clearly at a distance.

“Sometimes,” Harry replied and sat down cross-legged just a few inches away from the lake. “The stars are out.”

I joined him by the lake awkwardly and sat down on the damp grass. “Beautiful, aren’t they?”

He plucked a blade of grass from the earth, twiddling it in his fingers thoughtfully. “Yes, but beauty isn’t all there is to it. There’s always something more beneath the beauty…look, there’s Lily,” His voice trailed off as he raised his head towards the heavens.

“Lily?” I asked.

Harry nodded and pointed a finger at the stars, tracing a particular pattern. “Lily.” He confirmed.

“I’ve never heard of a constellation named Lily,” I commented as I gazed at the stars Harry had pointed to.

“I know. That’s because I named it myself. I’m pretty sure it must have its own name already, but to me, it’s Lily.” He stated firmly without looking away from the stars.

I needn’t question why he named it as Lily. I’ve read many books on Lily Potter, her Hogwarts years as Lily Evans, up to her final years in life as a caring mother to her enfant child Harry.

I didn’t know how to reply, but staying silent seemed rather rude at this point. “That’s very…thoughtful of you.”

Harry tossed the blade of grass into the lake. “Prongs, Padfoot, and Moony aren’t out yet. I wonder what’s delaying them.” He had a faraway look in his eyes, a look I never saw before. I wasn’t sure of what he meant by ‘Prongs, Padfoot, and Moony’, but I guess it’s other people that he held close to his heart.

“So who..I mean…”

“The Marauders,” he replied with a small smile. “My father, godfather, and former professor. Dad’s gone because of the same reason as mum…Padfoot and Moony? Well…they’re gone because of the war just a year ago…”

I bit my lip. “I’m sorry.” I said sincerely.

He grunted and shifted his position, our elbows brushed. “What about you Hermione?”

“What about me?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Anything,” Harry shrugged, tossing a pebble into the lake.

I hugged my knees and stared at the ripples formed on the glassy surface of the water. “My parents are dentists. They’re muggles…I’ve got a baby sister now. Anthea, but grandma finds that too hard to say so she’s just Annie to grandma.” I glanced at Harry’s silhouetted figure. “And…well, I like books.”

“I’ve noticed,” He answered.

“You have?”

Harry turned to look at me. “Yeah..”


“You’re noticeable,” He answered quickly and shifted his glasses lightly. “I like books.” He added merely.

I shifted my eyes to my reflection staring back at me on the surface of the lake, peaceful. “Do you study alot? I noticed that you’re top of the class with me.”

“Me? Study?” He almost laughed, but didn’t. Instead he chuckled. “No, I don’t study as much as you. I just know things without having to put too much effort into it. Some might say it’s unfair but…”

“It’s talent,” I finished off and he turned to lay those startling eyes at me again. I swallowed and returned to gazing at my own face in the lake.

“I suppose you could call it that,” Harry seemed to be getting something out of his robes and a moment later a ball of blue flames erupted from the end of his wand and was hovering a few inches away from us above the water, radiating a soft blue glow and providing warmth. “Lots of things are unfair in this world…”

I glanced at him, “Why do you say that?”

“Just commenting,” He replied. “So what books do you read?”

“Everything basically,” I smiled. “I’ve read Hogwarts: A History probably too many times. I also enjoy muggle books though…one of my childhood favourites was Awake and Dreaming, by Kit Pearson…I thought it was…magical. I wasn’t a witch then, I was only 9.”

“Oh..I like that author too.” He mumbled. “I read anything I can get too, espeically during holidays when I have nothing better to do…” A strange look crossed his face, but I couldn’t tell if it was anger or grief. “I read about Quidditch alot also.”

I nodded in understanding. “I hear you’re a great Quidditch player.”

He shrugged, “Well, I admit I can play.”

“Oh..” Silence.

This was queer. Here I am, sitting beside Harry Potter, under the glow of the eerie moon and the presence of nobody but ourselves and the lake before us…somehow I felt rather calm and almost light headed. It didn’t feel wrong, but it didn’t feel completely right either, just sitting here with this stranger that no longer felt like a stranger. I felt warm, whether that blue ball of flame was there or not.

“Oh, look,” His brilliant green eyes shot upwards again and a grin appeared on his face. “Look,” He pointed again.

“Who is it now?” I murmered.

He dropped his hand lightly. “It’s Hermione. She doesn’t come out often, espeically when there’s no full moon.” Harry looked at me again. “But when she does appear, she’s the brightest of them all. See?”

I looked at the stars in awe. I wasn’t really thinking (for once), wasn’t really that curious to ask why he named the constellation after me, but I was just staring.

Never have stars held so much meaning, never have they shone so bright.

And never have I had them named after me.
The stands were hectic, blazing with scarlet and green, cheers from the crowd, and the weather was perfect. Perfect for the first Quidditch match of the season. No storm cloud in sight, surely no drop of rain would make its way upon the heads of the Quidditch players today.

I sat excitedly on my seat, Colin Creevey cheering loudly beside me as Ron zipped by us with his signature grin plastered on his freckled face. The teams were making their laps around the field before the captains shook hands on the sound of the whistle blowing from Madame Hooch.

I instantly heard the loud squeals of delight from Lavender and Parvati as Harry zoomed by close to the Gryffindor stands. Did he just smile at me? No…of course not. But maybe, just maybe he did. Yet I finally had to agree with my two roommates on something. Harry was awfully charming on a broom, his unruly hair getting more mangled from the wind whipping in his face and an almost visible smile on his usually expressionless face.

I sighed, while Colin excitedly pointed out to me with his camera raised. “Ooooh it’s starting!”

At once I realized that the speed they had been flying at perviously was not considered fast at all. This was fast. Now the fourteen players were all just dots of scarlet and green to my eyes as they played at an amazing speed across the field. Passing the Quaffle to and fro and finally..

“10-0 GRYFFINDOR!” Liam Markus announced. I had heard comments on how the former Quiddtich commentator, Lee Jordan, had been one of the best. But Liam followed up to his task, so he stayed.

I waved my little red flag in the air enthusiastically as I watched Ginny put on a burst of speed on her broom to catch the Quaffle that another player had tossed in her direction. Ginny was good on a broom, much like her brother who was doing his job as Keeper excellently. I was on the edge of my seat as the Quaffle came pelting towards Ron’s direction but in a blink of eye he had blocked it. Yes!

The game went on for quite a while like this, with no team scoring and no Seekers spotting the Snitch yet. Seamus was Gryffinder Seeker, and at the moment he was flying above the stands and goal posts looking much like a person on the crow’s nest of a ship. My eyes lingered towards Harry who was doing something similiar to Seamus, minus the anxious expression though.

“10-10! It’s a tie right now! Let’s just hope that…OH MAN! That was a close one with that Bludger! Almost hitting our player Dean Thomas on the head. Damn those Slytherins..”

I watched as Professor McGonagall scolded Liam for the use of explicit language and he instantly went back to commenting on how the weather was not a problem for today’s match. I laughed when suddenly I noticed the crowds were awfully silent now…I quickly averted my gaze back towards the field to see Harry and Seamus zooming towards the bottom of the Slytherin’s goal posts.

I squinted and with the help of the sunlight I instantly spotted the glittering Snitch fluttering about. Harry’s expression was now full of determination, and Seamus was a bit of that and a bit of…worry on his face? Now I wasn’t so sure what to think…did I want Harry to get the Snitch, or Seamus? Well…strange, but I wouldn’t mind if Harry was the one to get the Snitch. Oh Hermione! What are you saying now? Cheering for the apposing team now are we?

But I had no more time to think about my own opinions because there were great gasps of shock and boos coming from both sides of the field. Gryffindors were wincing, and Slytherins were scowling. Harry and Seamus had both dived down, Harry attempting one of those Wonky Fetties or whatchamacallits, while Seamus had dived down at the same time- and hitting each other square in the head as they collided in mid-air just a few seconds away from the twittering Golden Snitch.

“YES! That was the perfect picture!” Colin declared as I heard a clicking of his camera.

I frowned and wondered if they were alright. Seamus seemed dazed while Harry was already trying to relocate the Snitch without delay. Meanwhile Ginny was trying to get past Millicent Bulstrode who was doing a good job trying to block her from passing the Quaffle to Dean. In an instant the Gryffindor stands were erupting into cheers of triumpth as Dean made a clean shot into one of the Slytherin goal posts, causing the Slytherins to shoot daggers at us through their menacing eyes. This game was sure fast paced.

“Oh my god!” A squeal from Lavender was heard above the cheering and everyone fell silent as they followed her gaze towards Harry who seemed to be flying…towards the sky? What in the world?

The hair that usually fell in front of his eyes were no longer plastered to his forehead, but blowing wildly around him as he headed upwards in an almost straight line. Then all at once, when we thought he would start burning up due to the earth’s gravitational pull and all that, he suddenly dropped downwards with a glint in his eyes. We all held our breaths.

Seamus didn’t seem to have a clue at what Harry was doing, except when Harry was inches away from the ground he noticed that Harry had been chasing the Snitch all along. And now, without a second to spare, Harry had reached out with his left hand and laced his fingers around the Golden Snitch.

The Gryffindors just stared, while the Slytherins lept from their seats in joy. I wasn’t really sure what to feel. I wasn’t sad, and I wasn’t overjoyed like the Slytherins. I was muddled up and I suppose…I was almost happy. Happy for the Slytherins? Maybe happy for Harry. Yeah.

“Hi, Hermione,” a voice interupted my thoughts so that it took me a few seconds to realize that a person was hovering a few feet away from me. I met those familiar green eyes that I was so use to gazing at now.

“Hi..” I took in everything…the sweat that had formed on his face, his slightly damp hair, his flushed cheeks…clad in his green Quidditch robes. I didn’t think I had ever seen him so…real. So open, so revealed and away from those hideous shadows…

“Want to come for a short ride?” He had his hand oustretched towards me.

I blinked twice. I was hullicinating now. “Pardon?”

He had a slight grin on his face. “I asked, want to come for a ride? A short one since we have to get back inside anyways…” Harry looked at me, waiting for my answer.

Flying was not my thing. Like sports and make-up was not my thing either. I was afraid of heights, and I would have to be in some serious danger to force me onto a broom. But here was Harry, offering me a ride…with him. Oh bother, this was a rather hard choice. I could either risk my own death or just..have a great time that would probably last in my memories forever. Well…

“Sure!” I blurted out and stood up as stiff as a rock. He smiled as I layed my hand in his outstretched palm and felt his moist hands enclose on mine, as if he was lacing his fingers around the Snitch all over again. But no, this was just my hand. And he easily lifted me onto the broom, positioning me behind him.

“Here,” he brought my hands onto his waist and I automatically gripped his robes tightly as he turned the broom.

“Oh dear, we won’t go too high, right?” I buried my face into his back, scared to look down or up. He laughed as he looked over his shoulder and stared down at my wide eyes. “Relax, you trust me don’t you?”

Trust you? How can I trust you right now? All of a sudden? But I suppose…I just nodded. He smiled, “I won’t let you fall.” His eyes were steady, his face was serene and calm. The uneasiness in my body suddenly washed away…as if he was the wind and had blown away all my worries with a simple blow.

I sighed, and smiled wider. “Ok, I trust you.”


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